All My Bags Are Packed

My principal, Mr. Shufelt, retired when I was attending Mary Gardner Elementary School in Chateauguay, Quebec (Canada). We held a big celebration. I was part of the choir that sang, All My Bags Are Packed by John Denver. This was followed by the song, 500 Miles by Bobby Bare (I think!).

I still remember both these songs, word for word, and often find myself singing the words:

All my bags are packed

I'm ready to go

I'm standin' here outside your door

I hate to wake you up to say goodbye

But the dawn is breakin'

It's early morn

The taxi's waitin'

He's blowin' his horn

Already, I'm so lonesome

I could die.

I wonder if it was this moment that fuelled my wanderlust? Shortly after, I flew alone to visit my grandparents in the Netherlands. I recall the thrill of travelling alone! I also remember sheer loneliness despite being with my grandparents and sobbing over the telephone to my mother that I wanted to come home. Mind you, it was also on that trip that I cracked my two front teeth riding in a bumper car. So it is no wonder I wanted to go home!

Today, my bags are half packed as we prepare to fly home tomorrow, a 5 1/2 hour flight to Taipei and then a 10 1/2 hour flight home. Our villa has the luxury of laundry facilities; a load is spinning in the washing machine while I stretch out on the couch, directly under the air conditioner, listening to jazz.

I am often reluctant to wrap up my travels, but I look forward to heading home. I am feeling my age on this trip. However, as I write these words, I realize I am not feeling my age. Instead, I am keenly aware that I am not taking good care of my body. I have had days that I could barely climb the stairs. I blamed the arthritis in my knee while knowing that if I lost a few pounds, my knee might feel better. I found it more difficult to walk long distances. The heat partially accounted for that, but also I have barely exercised these last few months! And then there are my eating habits. In Bali, much like other countries where I have been served plenty of unprocessed foods, I am reminded that my diet needs improvement!

However, there are some things I can attribute to age. I am rethinking my longtime desire to travel and stay in one place for two to three months. Exploring my own backyard is calling to me. I want to head off on road trips and explore Canada - maybe in a camper with a dog! I also miss routine - sitting on the deck sipping a glass of wine with good friends, singing silly songs with my granddaughter, curling up with my girls for a good chat, long morning walks through the rainforest and along our island shores, and gardening and working on our home with my husband.

I have been thinking about what I want to do these next months. I want to dig my hands in the dirt to birth a new garden at our island home! I plan to focus more on my physical health. And - this is difficult for introverted me - I need to make friends here on the island! I know no one other than some casual acquaintances. As much as I adore my husband, I am lonely for in-person contact with other women. 

And what do I want to do for me? More of what I love most - reading, learning, writing, and creating! I want to re-vamp the Ageless Possibilities website with words and photos that reflect what I am learning on this journey. I am eager to plunge into a couple of personal writing projects. I want to continue learning! I have signed up for a diploma course on journal therapy. I have registered for a self-publishing workshop. I plan to join a gardening group because I do not have a green thumb! And I want to do something outside my comfort zone - mind you, trying to make new friends may be all I can manage for now!

Do you find yourself pausing and re-assessing where you are going? Or maybe, like me, you stop for some fine-tuning? I have been in free fall since my husband retired, enjoying the luxury of not having to plan. The realization has dawned that while I may not need to plan my life as elaborately as I did in my younger days, I need to check the compass regularly to ensure I am still paddling north on the river of my life!